My fifth child is on his way, and he is kicking and rolling around as we speak. I am grinning as I type this in the coffee shop down the street from my house, because this baby truly seems to crave movement. If I sit or lay down, he immediately starts moving. And while I know he is still tiny and delicate–maybe two pounds or so–he feels like he takes up so much of me already.
I write this post for myself. In two months or so when this baby arrives, I want to make sure I remember this:
I have just enough time today to do God’s will for today.”
When I’m spending hours a day looking at unfolded laundry and toys and the stuff of daily life sprayed across my house while I nurse a new baby boy.
When I take out a freezer meal for dinner one-handed (because I’m holding a classic five o’clock fussing Franco) and I have to gently shove dishes and apple cores and dress-up beads and a broken Spiderman watch and a still-open peanut butter jar out of the way so that I can put the bag on the counter to thaw.
When I write down a somewhat important to-do item on next week’s agenda, again.
Yes, when I’m again in that forever-feeling season of round-the-clock nursing and adjusting to taking an additional little person with me everywhere I go and not-getting-much-done-around-the-house (compared to now), may I remember that God will provide the time for what He truly is asking me to accomplish each day, even if there are thirteen pairs of shoes by the back door and my crawling one-year-old finds both three-day-old fig bar pieces and dust bunnies under the kitchen table.
I have just enough time today to do God’s will for today.
I won’t get everything right this time as a new mom. I’ll probably still cry a lot. I’ll probably still lose my temper more easily with the big kids. I’ll probably still be a little stressed that my house is messy so much more of the time than before.
But may I let an honest acceptance of God’s to-do list for me each day give me peace. May I remember that this too shall pass. And may I trust that good enough is enough, especially when paired with God’s grace.
And one more thing. May I enjoy my baby son as much as I enjoyed his siblings, so that when I can’t give him five hundred kisses a day (I mean, seriously Mom?!), or sing silly lullabies to him (because, Mom, that’s sooo annoying), or even see him every day (because Mom, I got accepted to my dream college five hours away!), I will not be able to regret that I didn’t delight in him enough.