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Erin Franco

Obedience for moms?

Humble Handmaid· Interior Life

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2012 21 Aug
I don’t usually have many problems with following rules. I have such an extra-ordinarily sensitive conscience that I am honestly (usually) grateful for rules.

My almost-three-year-old, Gabriel, is not allowed to touch the stove or the oven in the kitchen. He gets pretty frustrated with me sometimes. One day, though, my sweet boy isn’t going to need to obey this rule anymore.  At some point, not touching a hot stove will become a no-brainer.

As wives and mothers, what things large and small does God ask each us individually to be obedient to that will eventually become no-brainers for us? 

I’ve been reflecting on the fact that, beyond following the the Ten Commandments and Church teaching, we are all called to spiritual obedience in living out the holiness we are each created us for, within the vocation and individual circumstances God has put in our lives.
One thing that I’m working on right now in my life is getting up “on time” in the morning. My kids sleep until 6:45 or 7am, so a while back I decided that 6am was a realistic wakeup time for me to rise before my family to really pray and do some spiritual reading, then do a quick chore or two, and get organized for the day. I have found that, if I go to bed by 10:30 or occasionally 11 (and I’m not pregnant, sick, nursing a baby all night, or post-partum:), I can get up at 6am and be OK for the day.

*NOTE: I have plenty of friends whose children have trouble sleeping through the night, or who have special circumstances which make getting up in the morning period a huge challenge, let alone getting up before the family to pray. I’m simply sharing one goal I personally have felt called to. I think the point is that God means us each to find some time each day to pray and re-center our lives on Him, whether it’s in the morning or a few stolen minutes of quiet time at some other point in the day.*

I think we are created to do well whatever God has entrusted us with in our lives. And centering our lives on prayer–instead of fitting it in if we get everything else done–is the very first step to doing everything else in our lives well. If getting up at a certain time generally helps me be a better wife and mother, in that practically it really does help me be more peaceful, organized and “pre-prayered” for my family and my day, then I think I’m at the point where I really need to look at getting up on time as obedience to my vocation–and to God.

Our culture trains us to distrust the word “obedience.” The word certainly used to give me the heebie-jeebies, especially when I was starting to prepare for marriage a few years ago and I had to really look at Church teaching on marriage! For once, I rebelled initially at what I saw as a list of old-fashioned rules. Once I honestly started looking at why the Church teaches what it teaches, I quickly saw the beautiful framework behind everything, and like my little Gabriel with the hot stove, more quickly than I ever expected I no longer even needed the “rules.” I came to know and understand deeply which actions, behaviors and choices upheld my dignity and integrity as a woman, as well as the dignity of the vocation of marriage.

I know that I have readers who enjoy my blog but secretly think I’m a little scrupulous and unrealistic. Maybe they think that I’m a sweet, but idealistic girl with pretty thoughts that sound nice, but are a little over-the-top. “Obedience?” they think. Don’t be so hard on yourself. That’s unhealthy. 

You know, though, I don’t think I can live well a single day in my life without my responses to that. As it is, I live plenty of my days in a lesser manner than I was created to, I think. 🙂 

Loving God with all your heart, soul, body and mind is over-the-top. I’m not a saint, but that’s the goal! We are all called to be saints. (And that is a very true, very challenging, and little-known teaching of the Catholic Church.:) Probably every saint that ever lived was considered over-the-top by everyone around them, I’ll bet. It’s supposed to be that way. If we’re doing things right, we will stick out in our world without even trying–just like the saints. I think we can all agree how much the world needs Christians–and Catholics, for that matter!–who stick out in a good way.:) 
Mother Teresa said once that the world doesn’t need more good people; the world needs more holy people. In this sad, culture-of-death world where the average person might claim to be generally “good,” I’m going for holy, because based on how the world is today, going for “good” isn’t working out for most of us very well. 
* * * 
Here’s a great read from the Catechism on Catholics’ belief that all Christians are called to holiness through conversion, justification, and sanctification in a life in Christ. Wish I would have heard more about the Catechism of the Catholic Church before, oh, college (despite 13 years of Catholic schools, yikes!). This beautiful, clear book spells out and explains all the teachings of the Catholic Church. The real teachings, the same unchanging teachings that the Church has been teaching for a couple thousand years. 🙂
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Hi there!

I'm a south Louisiana girl, Catholic wife, writer, speaker, and mother of six. Since I started my blog way back in 2009, life has been a roller coaster of babies, plot twists and a plane crash or two. I've been chronicling things here as I've been learning to love and suffer and laugh and trust in the goodness of God in the ordinary and the extraordinary--with a little espresso and a lot of Divine Mercy. Read More…

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