Michael recently saved me from myself again.
The school year had started. I was doing that thing where you think if you just sort of step up your game a little, you can add some major new responsibilities to your life and everything will work out just fine.
I thought I could keep up with my summer flurry of activity on my blog and podcast. Even though, mind you, I had lost nearly all of my sweet weekly mother’s helpers, as well as my siblings-on-summer-break babysitting. I thought I could add an hour-round-trip carpool to my son’s school and then homeschooling my daughter to my daily schedule, over and above my normal housework and homemaking responsibilities.
I was getting up at 4a.m. to do blog work and pray and meal plan and make school lunches and prep my homeschool day. I had every single hour of the week dedicated to something on my to-do list. I was a zombie by 3pm every day. I went to bed teary and exhausted every night.
I kept up with this ultra-ambitious schedule, more or less, for a couple of weeks. Then, Michael said one night out of the blue, “You can’t keep doing this. You’re exhausted.”
It wasn’t working out just fine, and Michael called me out on it.
I took a self-righteous swim in denial for an hour or so. Then, something inside of me just…relaxed.
I needed my husband to say something. I needed permission to step back. I needed my husband to save me from myself.
Not all damsels in distress know they’re in distress. I think that we damsels often think that distress is just our lot–that our extremely busy schedules, paralyzing guilt, or self-imposed pressure to do or be something–is “just part of being a blogger ” or “just part of motherhood” or “just part of my job.”
Sometimes, it is an act of bravery for our husbands to attempt to rescue their damsel when she’s acting crazy. Trust me, Michael knew I was shooting mental daggers at him during my aforementioned swim in the waters of denial. But saving me is part of my husband’s God-given job description. I need to try and be humble enough to take these kinds of interventions seriously.
These past few weeks, my daily to-do list is much more manageable. I’ve been less stressed and more present to my family. (Michael just read this and told me that he heartily agrees.:)
When has your husband saved you from yourself? In what areas of your life do you think it’s time to ask his opinion on what is best for you?
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I have a little present for all of you. I’ve had several family members and friends over the past couple of years ask me to email them my daily to-do list. It’s a one-page Word document that I print out a week at a time and clip onto my refrigerator. I fill out a new sheet every morning with what I need to get done that day, and I check things off as I move through the day. It’s nothing fancy–just something that helps me stay organized and prioritized. And it’s black and white, because (a) we don’t have a color printer and (b) I don’t want to waste money printing a daily to-do list in color anyway. 🙂
Just click on the link below to download my daily to-do sheet in a Word document. Feel free to customize the layout to what categories suit you and your family’s needs. Enjoy, and God bless!
My To Do List
Hi Erin! Just discovered your blog and I’m enjoying your posts and podcasts! I can definitely relate to your struggle to find time for everything. Thanks for sharing your printable, the quote from Colossians is awesome, and so timely – my daughter has been singing a song based on it that she recently learned in Vacation Bible School and I think God keeps bringing it to my heart for a reason as I start to juggle working part time while being a stay at home mom.
I loved this comment–thanks Nathalie!;) I’m so glad you are liking the blog and podcast too. It’s been a labor of love and so much fun over the years. I’m taking a wee break while I wait to have my baby, but I am already looking forward to writing again when God helps me to find the time and energy.;)
Prayers for your upcoming delivery! Definitely take your time in enjoying your family and finding your new normal. 🙂
“Sometimes, it is an act of bravery for our husbands to attempt to rescue their damsel when she’s acting crazy.” This is so true and something that is VERY hard for me to appreciate. But when I focus on having the right heart (so stealing that phrase from your podcast name- I find it so true and inspiring!) I can find his heroism and generosity more often in his actions. Thanks for posting!!
It’s hard for me to do too, sometimes! Especially when my first thought is, “Well, I wish he would have said that differently instead of {how he said it}!} So glad you connected to that post. I’m so glad Michael didn’t mind me sharing that little window into our marriage.:)
I really relate to this post. It is a great act of mercy for someone to tell you that you’ve taken on too much and it’s OK to stop it! Your husband should get a Superman cape for that.
It’s funny though…it was just a no-nonsense, this-is-obvious thing for him to say. Enough was enough. He didn’t try to say it the most charitable way possible, or at the right time. He just said it, and part of learning humility is that he was speaking the truth, no matter if it was packaged perfectly or not.
But yes, he is totally super-awesome. Even when he drives me nuts, I know it deep down and surely. 🙂
Erin,
Thanks for your post. I love the “shooting mental daggers” part! That is so me when I get angry at my husband for telling me something I desperately need to hear, but don’t want to admit! I feel like there are so many pressures out there these days (and maybe too many of them are self-inflicted) for moms to be perfect and do everything. I can only imagine that this applies to both working outside of the home moms and stay at home (in my opinion, a different kind of “working”) moms. There have been plenty of times when my husband has had to “talk me off of the ledge” and help me to realize that it REALLY IS OKAY if I don’t get to everything on my to-do list EVERY day. There are so many beautiful seasons in life and motherhood. I’m starting to embrace, in a good way, that maybe now is not my season for doing “everything” all of the time (e.g. homecooked meals every night, pristine house, clean & immediately put away laundry, etc.). Finding a balance between experiencing the joy of time with my children every day and getting the housework complete is a daily struggle, but it is a great one to have. 🙂